Dear Friends:
I am excited about getting some time to write for this newsletter again. When I sat down to write, I came upon one of the first articles I wrote for this newsletter . It’s exactly the heart of what I love to share about, so I’m sending it out first, and I’ll follow with the article I’m working on now – ways to get that quiet place back once it’s lost.
This article is from 2002, and is as true today as it was then. I hope you enjoy it. Look for a follow-up soon. Love in His Amazing Grace, Mardy
Welcome to the August 2002 edition of A "MARY" HEART.
I skipped my morning prayer time one morning this month, and enjoyed a relatively productive, fruitful day. The next morning, I skipped it again, praying as I went about my duties, "I will seek You out quietly sometime today, Lord." But, that time didn't appear that day. The next day I excused myself because my normal place of secret prayer had been invaded by children the day before and had been left a mess. When I finally returned to rising early and crying out to God on my face, five days had passed. They had been good days. The children worked and played in relative harmony, we were unexpectedly blessed with clothes and gifts from friends, and I wasn't struck by lightening. :) But, oh, my cool little heart when at last I returned to secret prayer.
From where did those little layers of self-sufficiency come? Hmmm, they weren't there last week. And when did my pride groan at humbling myself before the Lord each day? My heart, which had been undergoing patient and gracious peeling of thin layers of self by the Great Physician as He daily exposed true motives and secret fears, had begun to grow layers of flesh again. Those layers were quickly on their way to building a dividing wall between the Savior and me once again.
…every branch in Me He prunes that it may bring forth more fruit. Jn 15:2
But, I barely had time to sense them growing again in the busyness of my daily life. Only in the quiet moments when no one else was around, crying out to God once again, did I sense the deterioration of my own heart into the direction of its former state. The state of my unprayed-for heart reminded me of swimming pool water which it looks good on its own for a few days, but unless it gets that regular treatment of chlorine, will turn green and host to all sorts of uncleanness. It also reminded me of a vegetable garden which a gardener decided to ignore for a few days (bear with me, we have seven children and I tend to think in pictures). In Florida, a garden ignored for even a few days means a new batch of weeds growing up quickly. As I took my eyes off of seeking “Master Gardener” that week, I looked instead on the “fruit” that I was already bearing. I can even remember a few subtle thoughts that said, “Well, things are going very smoothly,” and, “What blessings are rolling in!” and, “My, what a blessed day this was!”
But, some of those blessings, I now realize, were answers to fervent prayer prayed months before, or just undeserved gifts of grace. The present state of my heart, however, was growing tiny new weeds around the edges (and some old weeds were trying to return). They were slowly, silently, steadily growing under my neglect. Who wants to weed when we can just sit back and enjoy fruit? Not I! I don’t want to do anything that makes me uncomfortable. And who wants to rise early to cry out to God, when we know that a pruning is waiting for us anyway? It is easier just to gaze on the fruit we already have. Or, if we do not have much good fruit yet, then it is easier to look at something else, a diversion of busyness or duties or pleasure, to keep our minds off of the fact that our crop is so small. Or that the weeds are getting so tall.
The good news is that God never expects us to weed the garden of our own hearts – He expects us only to let Him do that work. That is why, though the state of our own hearts will sometimes shock us (as the state of Paul’s heart shocked him causing him to write that he was the chief of all sinners), it should never overwhelm us. Because weeding is not our job. Looking to Jesus (the author and finisher of our faith…) is our job, and saying to Him,”Yes, you may weed. Yes, You may prune. Yes, I give You permission to clean and to mend and to correct and to till my heart according to Your will.”
If we look at our own hearts and try to “fix” them, we become either discouraged or deceived and proud. Much of the New Age teaching that we can look to our own “inner goodness” and become “empowered” is a result of being deceived as man focuses inward – instead of upward to the uplifted Lord Jesus Christ. We are not to look in the mirror for help, but He who gazes into the perfect law of liberty, and continues therein, not being a forgetful hearer, but a doer of the work (that God requires of us when we steadily, consistently gaze at Him), this man will be blessed in his deed (not a perfect quote of James 1:25).
If we look into our own hearts, we deceive ourselves. If we look away, because we are unwilling to suffer the discomfort of chastening or reproof, we only delay our promised reckoning and will have a larger crop of weeds choking out our good fruit, and a harder heart to try to find Him with. If we look to God (and cry out for power to obey whatever He asks), God does the work.
I encourage you to begin each day crying out to the Lord in a quiet place. I take my Bible and a journal and pen with me so I can jot down things as they come to mind. I try to pray the “Lord’s Prayer” each time, remembering that Jesus told us to pray for daily provision, daily forgiveness and to daily ask that we be not led into temptation. He also told His disciples in Gethsemane to pray they would not enter temptation. (This makes me want to alter that saying, “Lord, I can handle anything – except temptation!” – to “Lord, I can’t handle anything – especially temptation!”) We think we can handle temptation, but we do not know our own hearts – that under the right circumstances (or wrong circumstances, rather), every one’s heart would fall away. That is why God will cut the time short at the end – so that everyone’s faith does not fail.
When I first began to ask to be kept from evil and temptation, I did notice I was tempted less. But, my old way of looking at life was so automatic and natural, and my flesh had reigned for so long, that I often slipped back into old ways – sometimes without even being tempted, but just out of habit, or not really thinking about my actions and their consequences. And when I stop praying, I begin a slow return to my old ways. But, if I keep looking to the Lord afresh each morning for protection (asking to be kept from temptation and evil), and instruction (letting His Word and Spirit search my heart), I enter into His work (on my heart). His yoke then becomes easy I (don’t have to “fix” all those problems myself, just have to obey the next step, and let Him fix them), and His burden light.
As we search for the Lord in our daily lives, we sometimes want to "perform" for God, to show Him we are intent on serving Him, so we want to "do it right,” pray it right, be right. But, God has already done it right through the work of the Lord Jesus Christ, and He wants us simply to enter into His work – so we may enter into His rest.
My how I think you all must be wondering, “Doesn’t this woman ever sing another tune?” Well, yes, but every time I sit down to write this particular newsletter, this same old tune keeps coming to mind. So, stay “tuned,” and perhaps I will get a new one soon (and I am not even good at puns…)
Until next time, Mardy
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Monday, October 27, 2008
A Mary Heart is Back!
Hello Everyone!
I am so glad to finally get my "A Mary Heart" newsletter back up again. It is hard to believe it has been 6 months since I posted a newsletter to you all. It has been a whirlwind 6 months of family and ministry, but it looks like I will have some time to start writing again. I am so glad. Look for a new post in the next week or so!
Love in Jesus, Mardy
I am so glad to finally get my "A Mary Heart" newsletter back up again. It is hard to believe it has been 6 months since I posted a newsletter to you all. It has been a whirlwind 6 months of family and ministry, but it looks like I will have some time to start writing again. I am so glad. Look for a new post in the next week or so!
Love in Jesus, Mardy
Wednesday, April 2, 2008
Not Judging Judgmental People
Bill and I have been staying quite busy with counseling these days, which is a joy to both of us.
Recently, I was approached by two different teens about feeling condemned by judgmental Christians. When I heard the details of their complaints, I realized that had these precious girls been born 15 years earlier, and had the Lord allowed our paths to cross 15 years ago, that I would surely have been one of those offending Christians in their young lives.
Some of you on this list knew me in those days, and I am sure you are still shaking your heads in amazement at what the Lord can do with someone who was so disapproving of others who didn’t follow what I thought was God’s plan for their lives. It's not a fruitful (or fun) way to live, believe me, and it takes a supernatural work of the Lord in our hearts to open our eyes to how sinful it is and the extent of damage it causes in others.
But, that is what is so amazing about true Christianity – each step of sanctification, just like salvation, is the miracle of the Holy Spirit doing impossible things in our sinful hearts.
These young ladies were experiencing for the first time what we have all probably experienced at one time or another once we step inside the doors of the church. As a matter of fact, their frustration reminded me of a story someone once told me about a prince who fell passionately in love with a commoner and pursued her fervently until he won her heart. After the honeymoon, he brought her back to his castle to live happily ever after. Alas, she found herself not alone with him, but in a castle filled with his critical, nitpicking relatives who kept to distant parts of the castle to get away from her. She thus lamented over how easy it was to love her prince, but how difficult it would be to live with and love his family! A weak analogy, yes, but you get the idea – it is so much easier to love our perfect Savior than the imperfect body of Christ – especially when they become judgmental.
Though I still have a very (very, very, very) long way to go, the Lord has brought me on a journey by His grace from first being judgmental of others, then to seeing my sin, then to actually repenting of it, then to recognizing it in others and judging them for the same sin I had struggled with, then to beginning to accept others at their own maturity level (and letting the Lord judge), and finally to actually loving even judgmental, holier-than-thou people.
Yes, I do sometimes speak the truth in love, but only when gently led by His Spirit to do so. The fun part of living that way is that I often have the privilege of seeing the good fruit of repentance when I am led to speak. I think that is because people can sense when you really care about them or love them, or when you only care because they believe what you believe or do what you think they are supposed to do.
No, no, I haven't arrived – sometimes I still get angry when I see how much damage Christians do with judgmental attitudes, but then I remember how much damage I have done and I must extend (with the help of God's grace) the same patience and mercy I received.
I thought it would be helpful to share a part of the note I sent back to one of the young ladies in the hope it will encourage someone else who might be facing the judging finger of another Christian today. (BTW, their parents asked me if I would meet with them.)
Remember, it is God's opinion of us that matters, both now and on the last Day…
Love in our Amazing Savior, the Lord Jesus,
Mardy
Dear One,
Thank you for sharing what's going on in your life. I'd like to toss out a couple of thoughts for you to think about.
First, there will always be people who disapprove of decisions we make. There will be some who don't know the Lord yet who will disapprove of our commitments to Him, and those who are Christians who will disapprove of decisions we make in relation to our commitment to Him. This is the lot of everyone who is a Christian. It is your lot as a Christian. Remember that the Lord Jesus was judged by the very people He loved and came to serve - and He had no sin. And all of His followers faced the courtroom of other people's opinions, as has every great person in history. The larger your social circle, the greater opportunity for offense.
Knowing this, your goal is to try to live with a clear conscience, so that when (not if) people judge you, you will have already judged yourself to be guilt-free on whatever matter is at hand. To do this, you have to take that issue back to the Lord to "double-check" it with Him. That's because sometimes you will be wrong (none of us ever gets to be right all the time), and sometimes the Lord uses an "ass" to speak truth to His people. The most painful opinion to bear is that of a "Pharisee," one who knows what the Bible says but lacks the fruit of a Spirit-filled life. But if we dismiss the messenger, we might miss an important message the Lord intended for us to hear.
God's opinion of you is the one you want to discover and cling to, and the Bible is very clear that if you are His, He cherishes you. Remember that He does chasten His own, but as you read and re-read through the New Testament, you will see for yourself how tender and patient He is with His own, and how angry He Himself became with judgmental people.
It takes a mature person to take someone else's low opinion of them or their decisions back to the Lord in prayer and be open to possible correction from Him on it. But it is a practice you'll want to begin now because you will need this skill for the rest of your life. As you become an adult, you'll be entering a playing field where people's opposing opinions of you might be more derogatory and can move to a more public sector. You must develop the ability to sift through opinions apart from emotion, and without judging others for their opposing views. You don't want to become judgmental toward them in return so that you do not so grieve your Savior.
I have had a lot of experience with this, and if you're interested in hearing my stories, perhaps I can share some of them with you when we get together.
When someone expresses an opinion of me (or one of my decisions) that is disapproving, negative or judgmental, I try to take it back to the Lord in prayer. (Of course, we would never embrace or defend any activity that is already clearly addressed in Scripture.) I try to pray something like this:
"Lord, I don't even want to pray about this thing because I already feel I am in right-standing with You on it, but I do always want to stay open to Your correction and leading. So, please show me if there is anything You want me to learn about this. Please search me, oh God, and know my heart…"
Having done this many times, I can tell you that there is always a lesson that the Lord wants us to learn, even through judgmental people. Sometimes, when I asked Him to really search my heart on a topic, I saw I had been behaving like an infant – doing what my flesh wanted to, but telling myself I was walking in liberty. Paul describes this kind of immature Christian behavior when writing to the immature Corinthians.
"And I, brethren, could not speak to you as to spiritual men, but as to men of flesh, as to infants in Christ. I gave you milk to drink, not solid food, for you were not yet able to receive it. Indeed, even now you are not yet able…"
Other times I became aware that I was also guilty of judging people (for judging me). Sometimes He showed me why others' opinions were rattling me (I had been looking for approval from people rather than from Him). And sometimes my lesson was to just learn to love people, and forgive them freely, even when they didn't seem to love and accept me.
As you read through the Word and keep checking (and double checking) with Him, He will guide you. You will find, as you grow in Him, that there will be liberties at one stage of life that He will ask you to lay down at other stages, and vice-versa.
The most important thing is that you know yourself that you are pleasing the Lord in your life choices. His opinion on you is the one that must weigh the most with you at each stage, as I know it does for you now.
You also want to be the kind of person who can love and accept others even though you don't approve of their life choices. One of the best motivations for learning how to do this comes from knowing what it feels like to be on the other end.
I hope I've been an encouragement to you. Let me know your thoughts.
I am praying for you!
Mrs. Freeman
Here are a few verses on the danger of judging others. Don’t fall into this trap!
I care very little if I am judged by you or by any human court; indeed, I do not even judge myself. My conscience is clear, but that does not make me innocent. It is the Lord who judges me. Therefore judge nothing before the appointed time. Wait till the Lord comes. He will bring to light what is hidden in darkness and will expose the motives of men's hearts. At that time each will receive his praise from God. 1 Cor 4:3-5
For why should my freedom be judged by another's conscience? 2 Cor 10:29
But if we judged ourselves, we would not come under judgment. When we are judged by the Lord, we are being disciplined so that we will not be condemned with the world. 1 Cor 11:31-32
Accept him whose faith is weak, without passing judgment on disputable matters. Rom 14:1
Who are you to judge someone else's servant? To his own master he stands or falls. And he will stand, for the Lord is able to make him stand. Rom 14:4
Each one should be fully convinced in his own mind. Rom 14:5b
You, then, why do you judge your brother? Or why do you look down on your brother? For we will all stand before God's judgment seat. Romans 14:10
So then, each of us will give an account of himself to God. Therefore let us stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in your brother's way. Rom 14:12-13
So whatever you believe about these things keep between yourself and God. Rom 14:12
Do not speak against one another, brethren He who speaks against a brother or judges his brother speaks against the law and judges the law; but if you judge the law, you are not a doer of the law but a judge of it. James 4:11
One of the few warnings of what actions we are supposed to judge: I have written you in my letter not to associate with sexually immoral people — not at all meaning the people of this world who are immoral, or the greedy and swindlers, or idolaters. In that case you would have to leave this world. But now I am writing you that you must not associate with anyone who calls himself a brother but is sexually immoral or greedy, an idolater or a slanderer, a drunkard or a swindler. With such a man do not even eat. 1 Cor 5:9-20
Recently, I was approached by two different teens about feeling condemned by judgmental Christians. When I heard the details of their complaints, I realized that had these precious girls been born 15 years earlier, and had the Lord allowed our paths to cross 15 years ago, that I would surely have been one of those offending Christians in their young lives.
Some of you on this list knew me in those days, and I am sure you are still shaking your heads in amazement at what the Lord can do with someone who was so disapproving of others who didn’t follow what I thought was God’s plan for their lives. It's not a fruitful (or fun) way to live, believe me, and it takes a supernatural work of the Lord in our hearts to open our eyes to how sinful it is and the extent of damage it causes in others.
But, that is what is so amazing about true Christianity – each step of sanctification, just like salvation, is the miracle of the Holy Spirit doing impossible things in our sinful hearts.
These young ladies were experiencing for the first time what we have all probably experienced at one time or another once we step inside the doors of the church. As a matter of fact, their frustration reminded me of a story someone once told me about a prince who fell passionately in love with a commoner and pursued her fervently until he won her heart. After the honeymoon, he brought her back to his castle to live happily ever after. Alas, she found herself not alone with him, but in a castle filled with his critical, nitpicking relatives who kept to distant parts of the castle to get away from her. She thus lamented over how easy it was to love her prince, but how difficult it would be to live with and love his family! A weak analogy, yes, but you get the idea – it is so much easier to love our perfect Savior than the imperfect body of Christ – especially when they become judgmental.
Though I still have a very (very, very, very) long way to go, the Lord has brought me on a journey by His grace from first being judgmental of others, then to seeing my sin, then to actually repenting of it, then to recognizing it in others and judging them for the same sin I had struggled with, then to beginning to accept others at their own maturity level (and letting the Lord judge), and finally to actually loving even judgmental, holier-than-thou people.
Yes, I do sometimes speak the truth in love, but only when gently led by His Spirit to do so. The fun part of living that way is that I often have the privilege of seeing the good fruit of repentance when I am led to speak. I think that is because people can sense when you really care about them or love them, or when you only care because they believe what you believe or do what you think they are supposed to do.
No, no, I haven't arrived – sometimes I still get angry when I see how much damage Christians do with judgmental attitudes, but then I remember how much damage I have done and I must extend (with the help of God's grace) the same patience and mercy I received.
I thought it would be helpful to share a part of the note I sent back to one of the young ladies in the hope it will encourage someone else who might be facing the judging finger of another Christian today. (BTW, their parents asked me if I would meet with them.)
Remember, it is God's opinion of us that matters, both now and on the last Day…
Love in our Amazing Savior, the Lord Jesus,
Mardy
Dear One,
Thank you for sharing what's going on in your life. I'd like to toss out a couple of thoughts for you to think about.
First, there will always be people who disapprove of decisions we make. There will be some who don't know the Lord yet who will disapprove of our commitments to Him, and those who are Christians who will disapprove of decisions we make in relation to our commitment to Him. This is the lot of everyone who is a Christian. It is your lot as a Christian. Remember that the Lord Jesus was judged by the very people He loved and came to serve - and He had no sin. And all of His followers faced the courtroom of other people's opinions, as has every great person in history. The larger your social circle, the greater opportunity for offense.
Knowing this, your goal is to try to live with a clear conscience, so that when (not if) people judge you, you will have already judged yourself to be guilt-free on whatever matter is at hand. To do this, you have to take that issue back to the Lord to "double-check" it with Him. That's because sometimes you will be wrong (none of us ever gets to be right all the time), and sometimes the Lord uses an "ass" to speak truth to His people. The most painful opinion to bear is that of a "Pharisee," one who knows what the Bible says but lacks the fruit of a Spirit-filled life. But if we dismiss the messenger, we might miss an important message the Lord intended for us to hear.
God's opinion of you is the one you want to discover and cling to, and the Bible is very clear that if you are His, He cherishes you. Remember that He does chasten His own, but as you read and re-read through the New Testament, you will see for yourself how tender and patient He is with His own, and how angry He Himself became with judgmental people.
It takes a mature person to take someone else's low opinion of them or their decisions back to the Lord in prayer and be open to possible correction from Him on it. But it is a practice you'll want to begin now because you will need this skill for the rest of your life. As you become an adult, you'll be entering a playing field where people's opposing opinions of you might be more derogatory and can move to a more public sector. You must develop the ability to sift through opinions apart from emotion, and without judging others for their opposing views. You don't want to become judgmental toward them in return so that you do not so grieve your Savior.
I have had a lot of experience with this, and if you're interested in hearing my stories, perhaps I can share some of them with you when we get together.
When someone expresses an opinion of me (or one of my decisions) that is disapproving, negative or judgmental, I try to take it back to the Lord in prayer. (Of course, we would never embrace or defend any activity that is already clearly addressed in Scripture.) I try to pray something like this:
"Lord, I don't even want to pray about this thing because I already feel I am in right-standing with You on it, but I do always want to stay open to Your correction and leading. So, please show me if there is anything You want me to learn about this. Please search me, oh God, and know my heart…"
Having done this many times, I can tell you that there is always a lesson that the Lord wants us to learn, even through judgmental people. Sometimes, when I asked Him to really search my heart on a topic, I saw I had been behaving like an infant – doing what my flesh wanted to, but telling myself I was walking in liberty. Paul describes this kind of immature Christian behavior when writing to the immature Corinthians.
"And I, brethren, could not speak to you as to spiritual men, but as to men of flesh, as to infants in Christ. I gave you milk to drink, not solid food, for you were not yet able to receive it. Indeed, even now you are not yet able…"
Other times I became aware that I was also guilty of judging people (for judging me). Sometimes He showed me why others' opinions were rattling me (I had been looking for approval from people rather than from Him). And sometimes my lesson was to just learn to love people, and forgive them freely, even when they didn't seem to love and accept me.
As you read through the Word and keep checking (and double checking) with Him, He will guide you. You will find, as you grow in Him, that there will be liberties at one stage of life that He will ask you to lay down at other stages, and vice-versa.
The most important thing is that you know yourself that you are pleasing the Lord in your life choices. His opinion on you is the one that must weigh the most with you at each stage, as I know it does for you now.
You also want to be the kind of person who can love and accept others even though you don't approve of their life choices. One of the best motivations for learning how to do this comes from knowing what it feels like to be on the other end.
I hope I've been an encouragement to you. Let me know your thoughts.
I am praying for you!
Mrs. Freeman
Here are a few verses on the danger of judging others. Don’t fall into this trap!
I care very little if I am judged by you or by any human court; indeed, I do not even judge myself. My conscience is clear, but that does not make me innocent. It is the Lord who judges me. Therefore judge nothing before the appointed time. Wait till the Lord comes. He will bring to light what is hidden in darkness and will expose the motives of men's hearts. At that time each will receive his praise from God. 1 Cor 4:3-5
For why should my freedom be judged by another's conscience? 2 Cor 10:29
But if we judged ourselves, we would not come under judgment. When we are judged by the Lord, we are being disciplined so that we will not be condemned with the world. 1 Cor 11:31-32
Accept him whose faith is weak, without passing judgment on disputable matters. Rom 14:1
Who are you to judge someone else's servant? To his own master he stands or falls. And he will stand, for the Lord is able to make him stand. Rom 14:4
Each one should be fully convinced in his own mind. Rom 14:5b
You, then, why do you judge your brother? Or why do you look down on your brother? For we will all stand before God's judgment seat. Romans 14:10
So then, each of us will give an account of himself to God. Therefore let us stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in your brother's way. Rom 14:12-13
So whatever you believe about these things keep between yourself and God. Rom 14:12
Do not speak against one another, brethren He who speaks against a brother or judges his brother speaks against the law and judges the law; but if you judge the law, you are not a doer of the law but a judge of it. James 4:11
One of the few warnings of what actions we are supposed to judge: I have written you in my letter not to associate with sexually immoral people — not at all meaning the people of this world who are immoral, or the greedy and swindlers, or idolaters. In that case you would have to leave this world. But now I am writing you that you must not associate with anyone who calls himself a brother but is sexually immoral or greedy, an idolater or a slanderer, a drunkard or a swindler. With such a man do not even eat. 1 Cor 5:9-20
Monday, January 21, 2008
January 21, 2008
Good Morning A "Mary" Heart Subscribers!
I have posted another archived "Mary" Heart newsletter to the blog (Calling on the Lord Daily) below.
I also changed the poll questions (to the right) and would love to get your "vote" as well as your input. Have you been able to keep a quiet time with the Lord? What helped you to do that? I will post your encouragements to the blog.
I will wait to write about the issues of the last poll (making changes to the Christmas season) until the fall as we all prepare for that time again. In the meantime, if the Lord has shown you ways to simplify Christmas or make it more meaningful, I would love to hear.
Please bear with me as I learn to respond to the comment section on the blog and if I am slow on replying. I have read every one - and been so encouraged and blessed by you - but I may be a little slow in replying.
I leave with our 12 year old son, Joel, this morning for Nebraska! I am driving my mother and her husband back home after their Florida visit. It has been a time of precious lessons from the Lord that I wouldn't trade for anything. I would appreciate your prayers as we travel. I am looking especially forward to the one-on-one time with Joel on our return trip. We hope to be home again next Monday. I pray that you will meet with your Savior each day until then, waiting on Him, getting to know Him better, loving Him more.
Mardy
I have posted another archived "Mary" Heart newsletter to the blog (Calling on the Lord Daily) below.
I also changed the poll questions (to the right) and would love to get your "vote" as well as your input. Have you been able to keep a quiet time with the Lord? What helped you to do that? I will post your encouragements to the blog.
I will wait to write about the issues of the last poll (making changes to the Christmas season) until the fall as we all prepare for that time again. In the meantime, if the Lord has shown you ways to simplify Christmas or make it more meaningful, I would love to hear.
Please bear with me as I learn to respond to the comment section on the blog and if I am slow on replying. I have read every one - and been so encouraged and blessed by you - but I may be a little slow in replying.
I leave with our 12 year old son, Joel, this morning for Nebraska! I am driving my mother and her husband back home after their Florida visit. It has been a time of precious lessons from the Lord that I wouldn't trade for anything. I would appreciate your prayers as we travel. I am looking especially forward to the one-on-one time with Joel on our return trip. We hope to be home again next Monday. I pray that you will meet with your Savior each day until then, waiting on Him, getting to know Him better, loving Him more.
Mardy
Calling on the Lord Daily
A “Mary” Heart Newsletter
May 2002
I skipped my morning prayer time one morning this month, and enjoyed a relatively productive, fruitful day.
The next morning, I skipped it again, praying as I went about my duties, "I will seek You out quietly sometime today, Lord."
But, that time didn't appear that day. The next day I excused myself because my normal place of secret prayer had been invaded by children the day before and had been left a mess. When I finally returned to rising early and calling on the Lord, five days had passed.
They had been good days. The children worked and played in relative harmony, we were unexpectedly blessed with clothes and gifts from friends, and I wasn't struck by lightning. :)
But, oh, my cool little heart when at last I returned to secret prayer. From where did those little layers of self-sufficiency come? Hmmm, they weren't there last week.
And when did my pride groan at humbling myself before the Lord each day? My heart, which had been undergoing patient and gracious peeling of thin layers of self by the Great Physician as He exposed true motives and secret fears, had begun growing hard little layers of flesh again. Those layers were quickly on their way to building a dividing wall between the Savior and me once again.
…every branch in Me He prunes that it may bring forth more fruit. Jn 15:2
But, I barely had time to sense those layers growing again in the busyness of my daily life. Only in the quiet moments when no one else was around, talking to God once again, trying to wait and listen, did I sense the deterioration of my own heart into the direction of its former state.
The state of my unprayed-for heart reminded me of swimming pool water which looks good on its own for a few days, but unless it gets that regular injection of chlorine, will turn green and host to all sorts of uncleanness. The chemicals are changing long before we can see the resulting algae.
It also reminded me of a vegetable garden if it is ignored for a few days. Little weeds seem to pop up out of nowhere. If they aren’t attended to when they appear, they can quickly take over the good fruit.
As I took my eyes off of seeking Master Gardener that week, I looked instead on the fruit I was already bearing. I can even remember a few subtle thoughts that said, “Well, things are going very smoothly,” and, “What blessings are rolling in!” and, “My, what a blessed day this was!”
But those blessings were no comparison to the joy of having a tender, obedient heart. The present state of my heart, however, was growing tiny new weeds (and some old weeds were trying to return). They were slowly, silently, steadily growing under my neglect.
But, who wants to weed when we can just sit back and enjoy fruit? Not I! I don’t want to do anything that makes me uncomfortable.
And who wants to rise early to call on the Lord if we know that a pruning is waiting for us anyway? It’s easier just to gaze on the fruit we already have. Or, if we do not have much good fruit yet, then it is easier to look at something else, a diversion of busyness or duties or pleasure, to keep our minds off of the fact that our crop is so small. Or that the weeds are getting so tall.
The good news is that God never expects us to weed the garden of our own hearts – He expects us only to let Him do that work. That is why, though the state of our own hearts will sometimes shock us (as the state of Paul’s heart shocked him causing him to write that he was the chief of all sinners), it should never overwhelm us. Because weeding is not our job.
Have you looked into your own heart and found new weeds growing? Don’t continue gazing at yourself in order to analyze all the reasons why. If we look very long into our own hearts, we can deceive ourselves with pride or become discouraged. If you look to Him, He will show you what you need to know about your own heart.
Have you noticed those weeds and turned away to look at something more pleasant? If we look away because we are unwilling to suffer the discomfort of chastening or reproof, we only delay our promised reckoning and will have a larger crop of weeds choking out our good fruit, and a harder heart to try to find Him with later.
Look to Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith.
If we look to Him (and ask Him for the power to obey whatever He asks), the Holy Spirit does the work. Faith is our work. He does the work in our hearts. Our part is to say to Him, “Yes, you may weed. Yes, You may prune. Yes, I give You permission to clean and to mend and to correct and to till my heart according to Your will.” If we look too far into our own hearts to try to fix ourselves, we become either discouraged or deceived and proud.
I encourage you to begin each day calling on the Lord in a quiet place.
I take my Bible and a journal and pen with me so I can jot down things as they come to mind. I also keep extra paper there to quickly jot down distractions so they won’t ccontinue to nag at me (ie: “Ooops, I was supposed to call my mother back yesterday!”).
I try to begin with the Lord’s Prayer each time, remembering that Jesus told us to pray that we be not led into temptation. When I first began to ask to be kept from evil and temptation, I did notice I was tempted less. But, my old way of looking at life was so natural, and my flesh had reigned for so long, that I often slipped back into old ways – sometimes without even being tempted, but just out of habit, or not really thinking about my actions and their consequences.
And when I stop praying, I begin a slow descent to my old ways.
But, if I keep looking to the Lord afresh each morning for protection (asking to be kept from temptation and evil), and instruction (letting His sweet Spirit search my heart), I enter into His work (on my heart). His yoke then becomes easy (I don’t have to fix all those problems myself. I just have to obey the next step, and let Him fix them), and His burden light.
As you begin to search more for the Lord in your daily life, you might feel you have to do it perfectly, and give up before you start. Our tendency is to perform for God to show Him we are intent on serving Him, or to do it right, pray it right, be right. But, God has already done it right through the work of the Lord Jesus Christ. He is not looking for a perfect perfomance, but a willing heart. He wants us simply to enter into His work by faith so we may enter into His rest.
Until next month, I leave you with some words from the book, George Muller of Bristol, by Arthur T. Pierson, which I am now reading:
Habit both shows and makes the man, for it is at once historic and prophetic, the mirror of the man as he is and the mold of the man as he is to be.
May 2002
I skipped my morning prayer time one morning this month, and enjoyed a relatively productive, fruitful day.
The next morning, I skipped it again, praying as I went about my duties, "I will seek You out quietly sometime today, Lord."
But, that time didn't appear that day. The next day I excused myself because my normal place of secret prayer had been invaded by children the day before and had been left a mess. When I finally returned to rising early and calling on the Lord, five days had passed.
They had been good days. The children worked and played in relative harmony, we were unexpectedly blessed with clothes and gifts from friends, and I wasn't struck by lightning. :)
But, oh, my cool little heart when at last I returned to secret prayer. From where did those little layers of self-sufficiency come? Hmmm, they weren't there last week.
And when did my pride groan at humbling myself before the Lord each day? My heart, which had been undergoing patient and gracious peeling of thin layers of self by the Great Physician as He exposed true motives and secret fears, had begun growing hard little layers of flesh again. Those layers were quickly on their way to building a dividing wall between the Savior and me once again.
…every branch in Me He prunes that it may bring forth more fruit. Jn 15:2
But, I barely had time to sense those layers growing again in the busyness of my daily life. Only in the quiet moments when no one else was around, talking to God once again, trying to wait and listen, did I sense the deterioration of my own heart into the direction of its former state.
The state of my unprayed-for heart reminded me of swimming pool water which looks good on its own for a few days, but unless it gets that regular injection of chlorine, will turn green and host to all sorts of uncleanness. The chemicals are changing long before we can see the resulting algae.
It also reminded me of a vegetable garden if it is ignored for a few days. Little weeds seem to pop up out of nowhere. If they aren’t attended to when they appear, they can quickly take over the good fruit.
As I took my eyes off of seeking Master Gardener that week, I looked instead on the fruit I was already bearing. I can even remember a few subtle thoughts that said, “Well, things are going very smoothly,” and, “What blessings are rolling in!” and, “My, what a blessed day this was!”
But those blessings were no comparison to the joy of having a tender, obedient heart. The present state of my heart, however, was growing tiny new weeds (and some old weeds were trying to return). They were slowly, silently, steadily growing under my neglect.
But, who wants to weed when we can just sit back and enjoy fruit? Not I! I don’t want to do anything that makes me uncomfortable.
And who wants to rise early to call on the Lord if we know that a pruning is waiting for us anyway? It’s easier just to gaze on the fruit we already have. Or, if we do not have much good fruit yet, then it is easier to look at something else, a diversion of busyness or duties or pleasure, to keep our minds off of the fact that our crop is so small. Or that the weeds are getting so tall.
The good news is that God never expects us to weed the garden of our own hearts – He expects us only to let Him do that work. That is why, though the state of our own hearts will sometimes shock us (as the state of Paul’s heart shocked him causing him to write that he was the chief of all sinners), it should never overwhelm us. Because weeding is not our job.
Have you looked into your own heart and found new weeds growing? Don’t continue gazing at yourself in order to analyze all the reasons why. If we look very long into our own hearts, we can deceive ourselves with pride or become discouraged. If you look to Him, He will show you what you need to know about your own heart.
Have you noticed those weeds and turned away to look at something more pleasant? If we look away because we are unwilling to suffer the discomfort of chastening or reproof, we only delay our promised reckoning and will have a larger crop of weeds choking out our good fruit, and a harder heart to try to find Him with later.
Look to Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith.
If we look to Him (and ask Him for the power to obey whatever He asks), the Holy Spirit does the work. Faith is our work. He does the work in our hearts. Our part is to say to Him, “Yes, you may weed. Yes, You may prune. Yes, I give You permission to clean and to mend and to correct and to till my heart according to Your will.” If we look too far into our own hearts to try to fix ourselves, we become either discouraged or deceived and proud.
I encourage you to begin each day calling on the Lord in a quiet place.
I take my Bible and a journal and pen with me so I can jot down things as they come to mind. I also keep extra paper there to quickly jot down distractions so they won’t ccontinue to nag at me (ie: “Ooops, I was supposed to call my mother back yesterday!”).
I try to begin with the Lord’s Prayer each time, remembering that Jesus told us to pray that we be not led into temptation. When I first began to ask to be kept from evil and temptation, I did notice I was tempted less. But, my old way of looking at life was so natural, and my flesh had reigned for so long, that I often slipped back into old ways – sometimes without even being tempted, but just out of habit, or not really thinking about my actions and their consequences.
And when I stop praying, I begin a slow descent to my old ways.
But, if I keep looking to the Lord afresh each morning for protection (asking to be kept from temptation and evil), and instruction (letting His sweet Spirit search my heart), I enter into His work (on my heart). His yoke then becomes easy (I don’t have to fix all those problems myself. I just have to obey the next step, and let Him fix them), and His burden light.
As you begin to search more for the Lord in your daily life, you might feel you have to do it perfectly, and give up before you start. Our tendency is to perform for God to show Him we are intent on serving Him, or to do it right, pray it right, be right. But, God has already done it right through the work of the Lord Jesus Christ. He is not looking for a perfect perfomance, but a willing heart. He wants us simply to enter into His work by faith so we may enter into His rest.
Until next month, I leave you with some words from the book, George Muller of Bristol, by Arthur T. Pierson, which I am now reading:
Habit both shows and makes the man, for it is at once historic and prophetic, the mirror of the man as he is and the mold of the man as he is to be.
Sunday, January 20, 2008
Getting and Keeping our Priorities by Obeying the Lord
I am writing again on hearing and obeying the Lord because of some conversations I had with a woman who felt burdened to meet pressing needs outside her home while her children were stumbling in sin and facing other struggles.
All children will stumble in sin and face struggles whether we are at home with them all the time or not. But, woe unto us if we are so concerned about needs outside our home that we miss the needs of our own children. And their needs aren’t always obvious.
Bill and I have two children who don’t openly express when something is bothering them. I have to sort of pick up on it if I notice they are a little quieter than usual. And even then they don’t open up unless they sense that I have truly shifted from my comfortable 4th or 5th gear lifestyle all the way down to neutral. I have to be willing to just sit and be with them. That takes time. But, that willingness to shelve everything else and just invest the time to be with them makes them feel valuable. And safe enough to open up.
Having said that, I will add that in this season of our lives, our own family is very (very) busy with outside-the-home activities. We tend to travel a lot, as well as host and entertain a lot. And our phone and inbox is usually busy.
However, it was not always so. When our children were younger our lifestyle was geared to primarily meeting our children’s physical needs, and then later emotional, academic and spiritual needs. Life centered around them, since they were weak and immature - as all children are.
Even now, with our children being so much older, we halt outside ministry if we sense one is beginning to stumble. Our children are just too important.
Jesus gave us a strong warning in Luke 17 when He said, “It is inevitable that stumbling blocks come, but woe to him through whom they come! It would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck and he were thrown into the sea, than that he would cause one of these little ones to stumble.”
Before I learned to wait on the Lord for direction, I was many times a stumbling block to my children, wanting to do something “of value” in the church or in the world, and consequently becoming too busy for my family. I allowed concerns about the needs of people or causes outside our home to take large amounts of time and emotional energy that were needed to help our own children learn to walk through their trials. At the end of the day when I put my head on my pillow I didn’t sense that I was living a very fulfilling life. A busy life, yes – just not a very fulfilling one. And my children continued to struggle.
I will add one small note here that there is also the danger of swinging to the other extreme and meeting every single one of our children’s needs (because doing so meets our own needs to fulfill them). The result is often children who are so dependent on us that they end up being less dependent on the Lord.
I’ll also add that I don’t believe it is Scriptural to say that wives and mothers can’t ever work outside the home or volunteer outside the home. According to Proverbs 31, the “Excellent Wife” apparently had her own clothing line (she made and sold clothing in the marketplace) as well as her own paycheck (she bought a field from her own earnings) and her own wine label, (it was a vineyard that she bought). She was praised for bringing her husband financial gain. It also seems the Proverbs 31 wife even let others keep up with some of her household duties while she got to work with her hands “in delight.”
The important point is that she didn’t allow those activities, which she enjoyed, crowd out her relationships with her family (Her children rise up and bless her, and the heart of her husband trusts in her). Nor did she squander all her personal income on herself or her family (She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy).
1 Corinthians 7 also tells us as long as a man or woman is single, he or she is “free” to please the Lord, but once they marry, they seek to please their spouse. A wife may be pleasing her husband by working outside the home. We need to be very careful not to judge one another on matters such as these, but to use our energies wisely – in hearing the Lord for our own lives, obeying what He says to us, and judging our own hearts.
The most important lesson in Proverbs 31 was that an excellent wife “fears the Lord.” It is that fear of the Lord, the very personal understanding that we will have to give an account to God for our time, our talents, our gifts, our choices of who we help, which needs we run to meet, that should cause us to make sure we are obeying His will for us. His will might look a little different for my life than it does for yours. To everything there really is a season, and a time for every purpose under Heaven: When our children are young or immature they need us much more. And He may never call one to serve outside the home, while another He may call to much service.
I do usually encourage mothers of young children to resist the pull of outside-the-home- activities or ministry, so they can be more available for their husbands and children. To concentrate on making their homes a center of love and peacefulness. Things go so much smoother when a woman’s energies, her talents and gifts, her lessons, her joys can be shared first with her own family.
On the other hand, I also encourage young women to get one-on-one time with a strong Christian sister who will encourage them. Rather than look to a husband as a source of encouragement, I think it is much more effective (and Scriptural) to look to him as a brother in Christ with strengths and weaknesses – and receive the encouragement we need from an older sister in Christ in ways to love and honor him. Encouragement from someone who has faced the same trials you are facing is very helpful, and I love the fact that older women are instructed to encourage younger women in Titus 2.
Below is part of the note I wrote to the mom who was busy meeting needs outside her home while her children were stumbling in sin and trials. I hope it is an encouragement to some of you as well.
A: I would never tell you what you should do in this situation. You’ll want to wait on the Lord for direction, and then run that by your husband for counsel. Waiting on the Lord is so important. I used to just pray and go. But praying is only where we begin. It’s like starting one end of a conversation. When we finish with what is on our heart, we need to wait and listen to what the other person has to say. Last, we obey whatever His will is for us.
Your children are temporary. Your neighborhood, your church group, your support group, ministries and causes will all be calling to you with needs – and their shortages, their openings, their opportunities, will be will be with you always – yea, even until the end of the age. If you miss teachable moments with your children, or just sitting with your family doing nothing at all (a wonderful experience by the way), you will live to regret it. But that is something you have to be convinced of inside yourself. No one else can make you grasp it. Don't miss it!
Here are a few lessons I've learned, some of them the hard way, when I’ve been pulled by people or needs (even godly people or good, genuine needs) outside our home. They are things I am sure you already know to be true, so I only share them in a spirit of bringing to your remembrance the Lord's goodness and truths:
When pulled by needs outside the home, I have learned:
· To not automatically say yes or just do what seems logical or needful, but to be sure to wait on the Lord for His gentle leading.
· That God leads – but guilt nags, fear runs and pride lures.
· To accept that God’s leading will sometimes cross my will. It will also sometimes be contrary to my ideas of what would be right or best.
· That God often directs me through my husband’s counsel, even though I didn’t see him praying about that issue. (Big, humble smile here)
· That the Lord's leading can be in a different direction than what other Christians are doing, even if we are in the same church, or where they are going.
· That His leading can be in a different than what other Christians, even if we are in the same church, think I should be doing or where other Christians think I should be going.
· That the proper response to being falsely judged or accused for obeying what I think the Lord wants me to do is to rejoice.
· That I have great peace and even joy in the midst of circumstances that don’t necessarily change – whenever I obey His will for me.
· That I am always sorry when I make decisions out of fear (of what others might think or say), or guilt (over what needs might fall through the cracks if I don’t step up to the plate), or pride (that I could meet that need so ably).
· That I’m always glad when I make decisions out of obedience to what I believe God is calling me to do, no matter how lonely or tough it feels at the time.
· That needs outside my home will be never-ending, but the needs of my children are short-term.
· That needs outside my home are generated by someone else’s children (everyone is someone else’s child), but the needs of my children are generated by – MY children.
· That I will be able to live with myself if things outside my home fail because I wasn't there, but I will have serious regrets if things fail inside my home because I wasn't there.
· That my greatest lessons on serving the Lord with humility have been learned, not in a women’s Bible study or a conference, but at home.
· That God provided has everything my children needed without my having to chase down opportunities for them.
That God has provided everything I needed without my having to chase down opportunities. I just didn’t always know what I needed.
Until next time, remember, when in doubt (and whenever)…
1. Call to the Lord
2. Wait and Listen
3. Obey
In Jesus’ Love,
Mardy
Proverbs 31:10-31
An excellent wife, who can find?
For her worth is far above jewels.
The heart of her husband trusts in her,
And he will have no lack of gain.
She does him good and not evil
All the days of her life.
She looks for wool and flax
And works with her hands in delight.
She is like merchant ships;
She brings her food from afar.
She rises also while it is still night
And gives food to her household
And portions to her maidens.
She considers a field and buys it;
From her earnings she plants a vineyard.
She girds herself with strength
And makes her arms strong.
She senses that her gain is good;
Her lamp does not go out at night.
She stretches out her hands to the distaff,
And her hands grasp the spindle.
She extends her hand to the poor,
And she stretches out her hands to the needy.
She is not afraid of the snow for her household,
For all her household are clothed with scarlet.
She makes coverings for herself;
Her clothing is fine linen and purple.
Her husband is known in the gates,
When he sits among the elders of the land.
She makes linen garments and sells them,
And supplies belts to the tradesmen.
Strength and dignity are her clothing,
And she smiles at the future.
She opens her mouth in wisdom,
And the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.
She looks well to the ways of her household,
And does not eat the bread of idleness.
Her children rise up and bless her;
Her husband also, and he praises her, saying:
"Many daughters have done nobly,
But you excel them all."
Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain,
But a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised.
Give her the product of her hands
And let her works praise her in the gates.
All children will stumble in sin and face struggles whether we are at home with them all the time or not. But, woe unto us if we are so concerned about needs outside our home that we miss the needs of our own children. And their needs aren’t always obvious.
Bill and I have two children who don’t openly express when something is bothering them. I have to sort of pick up on it if I notice they are a little quieter than usual. And even then they don’t open up unless they sense that I have truly shifted from my comfortable 4th or 5th gear lifestyle all the way down to neutral. I have to be willing to just sit and be with them. That takes time. But, that willingness to shelve everything else and just invest the time to be with them makes them feel valuable. And safe enough to open up.
Having said that, I will add that in this season of our lives, our own family is very (very) busy with outside-the-home activities. We tend to travel a lot, as well as host and entertain a lot. And our phone and inbox is usually busy.
However, it was not always so. When our children were younger our lifestyle was geared to primarily meeting our children’s physical needs, and then later emotional, academic and spiritual needs. Life centered around them, since they were weak and immature - as all children are.
Even now, with our children being so much older, we halt outside ministry if we sense one is beginning to stumble. Our children are just too important.
Jesus gave us a strong warning in Luke 17 when He said, “It is inevitable that stumbling blocks come, but woe to him through whom they come! It would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck and he were thrown into the sea, than that he would cause one of these little ones to stumble.”
Before I learned to wait on the Lord for direction, I was many times a stumbling block to my children, wanting to do something “of value” in the church or in the world, and consequently becoming too busy for my family. I allowed concerns about the needs of people or causes outside our home to take large amounts of time and emotional energy that were needed to help our own children learn to walk through their trials. At the end of the day when I put my head on my pillow I didn’t sense that I was living a very fulfilling life. A busy life, yes – just not a very fulfilling one. And my children continued to struggle.
I will add one small note here that there is also the danger of swinging to the other extreme and meeting every single one of our children’s needs (because doing so meets our own needs to fulfill them). The result is often children who are so dependent on us that they end up being less dependent on the Lord.
I’ll also add that I don’t believe it is Scriptural to say that wives and mothers can’t ever work outside the home or volunteer outside the home. According to Proverbs 31, the “Excellent Wife” apparently had her own clothing line (she made and sold clothing in the marketplace) as well as her own paycheck (she bought a field from her own earnings) and her own wine label, (it was a vineyard that she bought). She was praised for bringing her husband financial gain. It also seems the Proverbs 31 wife even let others keep up with some of her household duties while she got to work with her hands “in delight.”
The important point is that she didn’t allow those activities, which she enjoyed, crowd out her relationships with her family (Her children rise up and bless her, and the heart of her husband trusts in her). Nor did she squander all her personal income on herself or her family (She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy).
1 Corinthians 7 also tells us as long as a man or woman is single, he or she is “free” to please the Lord, but once they marry, they seek to please their spouse. A wife may be pleasing her husband by working outside the home. We need to be very careful not to judge one another on matters such as these, but to use our energies wisely – in hearing the Lord for our own lives, obeying what He says to us, and judging our own hearts.
The most important lesson in Proverbs 31 was that an excellent wife “fears the Lord.” It is that fear of the Lord, the very personal understanding that we will have to give an account to God for our time, our talents, our gifts, our choices of who we help, which needs we run to meet, that should cause us to make sure we are obeying His will for us. His will might look a little different for my life than it does for yours. To everything there really is a season, and a time for every purpose under Heaven: When our children are young or immature they need us much more. And He may never call one to serve outside the home, while another He may call to much service.
I do usually encourage mothers of young children to resist the pull of outside-the-home- activities or ministry, so they can be more available for their husbands and children. To concentrate on making their homes a center of love and peacefulness. Things go so much smoother when a woman’s energies, her talents and gifts, her lessons, her joys can be shared first with her own family.
On the other hand, I also encourage young women to get one-on-one time with a strong Christian sister who will encourage them. Rather than look to a husband as a source of encouragement, I think it is much more effective (and Scriptural) to look to him as a brother in Christ with strengths and weaknesses – and receive the encouragement we need from an older sister in Christ in ways to love and honor him. Encouragement from someone who has faced the same trials you are facing is very helpful, and I love the fact that older women are instructed to encourage younger women in Titus 2.
Below is part of the note I wrote to the mom who was busy meeting needs outside her home while her children were stumbling in sin and trials. I hope it is an encouragement to some of you as well.
A: I would never tell you what you should do in this situation. You’ll want to wait on the Lord for direction, and then run that by your husband for counsel. Waiting on the Lord is so important. I used to just pray and go. But praying is only where we begin. It’s like starting one end of a conversation. When we finish with what is on our heart, we need to wait and listen to what the other person has to say. Last, we obey whatever His will is for us.
Your children are temporary. Your neighborhood, your church group, your support group, ministries and causes will all be calling to you with needs – and their shortages, their openings, their opportunities, will be will be with you always – yea, even until the end of the age. If you miss teachable moments with your children, or just sitting with your family doing nothing at all (a wonderful experience by the way), you will live to regret it. But that is something you have to be convinced of inside yourself. No one else can make you grasp it. Don't miss it!
Here are a few lessons I've learned, some of them the hard way, when I’ve been pulled by people or needs (even godly people or good, genuine needs) outside our home. They are things I am sure you already know to be true, so I only share them in a spirit of bringing to your remembrance the Lord's goodness and truths:
When pulled by needs outside the home, I have learned:
· To not automatically say yes or just do what seems logical or needful, but to be sure to wait on the Lord for His gentle leading.
· That God leads – but guilt nags, fear runs and pride lures.
· To accept that God’s leading will sometimes cross my will. It will also sometimes be contrary to my ideas of what would be right or best.
· That God often directs me through my husband’s counsel, even though I didn’t see him praying about that issue. (Big, humble smile here)
· That the Lord's leading can be in a different direction than what other Christians are doing, even if we are in the same church, or where they are going.
· That His leading can be in a different than what other Christians, even if we are in the same church, think I should be doing or where other Christians think I should be going.
· That the proper response to being falsely judged or accused for obeying what I think the Lord wants me to do is to rejoice.
· That I have great peace and even joy in the midst of circumstances that don’t necessarily change – whenever I obey His will for me.
· That I am always sorry when I make decisions out of fear (of what others might think or say), or guilt (over what needs might fall through the cracks if I don’t step up to the plate), or pride (that I could meet that need so ably).
· That I’m always glad when I make decisions out of obedience to what I believe God is calling me to do, no matter how lonely or tough it feels at the time.
· That needs outside my home will be never-ending, but the needs of my children are short-term.
· That needs outside my home are generated by someone else’s children (everyone is someone else’s child), but the needs of my children are generated by – MY children.
· That I will be able to live with myself if things outside my home fail because I wasn't there, but I will have serious regrets if things fail inside my home because I wasn't there.
· That my greatest lessons on serving the Lord with humility have been learned, not in a women’s Bible study or a conference, but at home.
· That God provided has everything my children needed without my having to chase down opportunities for them.
That God has provided everything I needed without my having to chase down opportunities. I just didn’t always know what I needed.
Until next time, remember, when in doubt (and whenever)…
1. Call to the Lord
2. Wait and Listen
3. Obey
In Jesus’ Love,
Mardy
Proverbs 31:10-31
An excellent wife, who can find?
For her worth is far above jewels.
The heart of her husband trusts in her,
And he will have no lack of gain.
She does him good and not evil
All the days of her life.
She looks for wool and flax
And works with her hands in delight.
She is like merchant ships;
She brings her food from afar.
She rises also while it is still night
And gives food to her household
And portions to her maidens.
She considers a field and buys it;
From her earnings she plants a vineyard.
She girds herself with strength
And makes her arms strong.
She senses that her gain is good;
Her lamp does not go out at night.
She stretches out her hands to the distaff,
And her hands grasp the spindle.
She extends her hand to the poor,
And she stretches out her hands to the needy.
She is not afraid of the snow for her household,
For all her household are clothed with scarlet.
She makes coverings for herself;
Her clothing is fine linen and purple.
Her husband is known in the gates,
When he sits among the elders of the land.
She makes linen garments and sells them,
And supplies belts to the tradesmen.
Strength and dignity are her clothing,
And she smiles at the future.
She opens her mouth in wisdom,
And the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.
She looks well to the ways of her household,
And does not eat the bread of idleness.
Her children rise up and bless her;
Her husband also, and he praises her, saying:
"Many daughters have done nobly,
But you excel them all."
Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain,
But a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised.
Give her the product of her hands
And let her works praise her in the gates.
Friday, January 11, 2008
Deposing the Kingdom of Self
Hello Again Everyone,
As I think you all know, I enjoy the writings of A.W. Tozer.
Well, perhaps enjoy is too pleasant a word. I am often convicted by the writings of Tozer. One of the reasons I find him so refreshing is that rather than using a magnifying glass and scalpel to dissect meanings of words or to drive on about non-essential doctrines, he used the pulpit to describe what a personal relationship with Jesus looked like. And he so often used himself as a transparent and humble example.
Here is the devotional I found in my inbox this morning, taken from the book Tozer on Christian Leadership. You will enjoy, er, appreciate it.
Spiritual Warfare and Sin: My Kingdom Go
Your kingdom come. Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Matthew 6:10
It may surprise you that Aldous Huxley, often a critic of orthodox and evangelical Christianity, has been quoted as saying: "My kingdom go is the necessary corollary to Thy kingdom come."
Certainly His kingdom can never be realized in my life until my own selfish kingdom is deposed. It is when I resign, when I am no longer king of my domain that Jesus Christ will become king of my life.
Now, brethren, in confession, may I assure you that a Christian clergyman cannot follow any other route to spiritual victory and daily blessing than that which is prescribed so plainly in the Word of God. It is one thing for a minister to choose a powerful text, expound it and preach from it-it is quite something else for the minister to honestly and genuinely live forth the meaning of the Word from day to day.
A clergyman is a man-and often he has a proud little kingdom of his own, a kingdom of position and often of pride and sometimes with power. Clergymen must wrestle with the spiritual implications of the crucified life just like everyone else, and to be thoroughgoing men of God and spiritual examples to the flock of God, they must die daily to the allurements of their own little kingdoms of position and prestige. Who Put Jesus on the Cross?, 173-174.
"Lord, I quit, I resign. I'm no longer 'king of my domain.' I die this morning to 'my own little kingdom of position and prestige.' Rule in my life today. Amen."
For more information about LMI: http://lmi.gospelcom.net/
Now, if I could just accept that passage as it reads, I would be fine. I could go about my day thinking, “That’s right! Clergyman today certainly need to recognize their own little kingdoms of power and pride.”
But, no, I can’t let it rest with that. Or, rather, the Holy Spirit won’t let it rest there - in my mind – where it wants to sit all logical and factual and correct – and judgmental. He gently stands at the door of my heart with that little message in hand, bringing it to life. Would you like to know what began to stir in me after I read that? It is that just as clergyman are to set the example in humility to their flocks, so I as a mother am to be a humble example to our little flock. Now the passage takes on new meaning for me.
Now, brethren, in confession, may I assure you that a Christian mother cannot follow any other route to spiritual victory and daily blessing than that which is prescribed so plainly in the Word of God. It is one thing for a mother to choose a powerful text, and share it with her children - it is quite something else for that mother to honestly and genuinely live forth the meaning of the Word from day to day (before her children).
A mother is just a person - and often she has a proud little kingdom of her own, a kingdom of position and often of pride and sometimes with power. A mother must wrestle with the spiritual implications of the crucified life just like her children, and be a thoroughgoing woman of God and spiritual example to the flock of God, her children. She must die daily to the allurements of her own little kingdom of position and prestige.
It is easy to see that when our children were young, they saw us as the authority on all things in their world. And with good intentions, I used that authority to point them to the Scriptures and to fill their heads with knowledge about God and the Bible, thinking I was preparing them for life. But, in reality, it wasn’t until they witnessed the deposing of some of my own little kingdoms right before their eyes that they got to see and feel what a relationship with the Lord looked like. They needed to see the Kingdom of God rise out of the ashes of my old Kingdom of self and pride and power.
Those sins of pride, self and power were, by the way, many times disguised as spiritual self, spiritual pride, and spiritual power. I didn’t recognize them while I was functioning in them at full throttle. But, it is easy for people around us to recognize because those sins produce an air of spiritual arrogance or spiritual superiority and self-importance. The deposing of self is a most effective platform from which to reach people, and our children are no exception.
The direction the mature want to lead the immature is always toward less dependence on man and more dependence on God Himself. So the lesson for me in this devotional is that the I need to continue to depose my own kingdoms of pride, power and self, and keep letting the Great Shepherd of the sheep lead His own flock more and more.
Hmmm, I think that must be why I love, er, appreciate, Tozer so. He keeps pointing me, and ultimately our children through my changed heart, back to a living relationship with that Shepherd – as painful and humbling as that sometimes is.
Letting the Great Shepherd Himself reveal kingdoms of self and pride this morning along with you all….
Mardy
As I think you all know, I enjoy the writings of A.W. Tozer.
Well, perhaps enjoy is too pleasant a word. I am often convicted by the writings of Tozer. One of the reasons I find him so refreshing is that rather than using a magnifying glass and scalpel to dissect meanings of words or to drive on about non-essential doctrines, he used the pulpit to describe what a personal relationship with Jesus looked like. And he so often used himself as a transparent and humble example.
Here is the devotional I found in my inbox this morning, taken from the book Tozer on Christian Leadership. You will enjoy, er, appreciate it.
Spiritual Warfare and Sin: My Kingdom Go
Your kingdom come. Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Matthew 6:10
It may surprise you that Aldous Huxley, often a critic of orthodox and evangelical Christianity, has been quoted as saying: "My kingdom go is the necessary corollary to Thy kingdom come."
Certainly His kingdom can never be realized in my life until my own selfish kingdom is deposed. It is when I resign, when I am no longer king of my domain that Jesus Christ will become king of my life.
Now, brethren, in confession, may I assure you that a Christian clergyman cannot follow any other route to spiritual victory and daily blessing than that which is prescribed so plainly in the Word of God. It is one thing for a minister to choose a powerful text, expound it and preach from it-it is quite something else for the minister to honestly and genuinely live forth the meaning of the Word from day to day.
A clergyman is a man-and often he has a proud little kingdom of his own, a kingdom of position and often of pride and sometimes with power. Clergymen must wrestle with the spiritual implications of the crucified life just like everyone else, and to be thoroughgoing men of God and spiritual examples to the flock of God, they must die daily to the allurements of their own little kingdoms of position and prestige. Who Put Jesus on the Cross?, 173-174.
"Lord, I quit, I resign. I'm no longer 'king of my domain.' I die this morning to 'my own little kingdom of position and prestige.' Rule in my life today. Amen."
For more information about LMI: http://lmi.gospelcom.net/
Now, if I could just accept that passage as it reads, I would be fine. I could go about my day thinking, “That’s right! Clergyman today certainly need to recognize their own little kingdoms of power and pride.”
But, no, I can’t let it rest with that. Or, rather, the Holy Spirit won’t let it rest there - in my mind – where it wants to sit all logical and factual and correct – and judgmental. He gently stands at the door of my heart with that little message in hand, bringing it to life. Would you like to know what began to stir in me after I read that? It is that just as clergyman are to set the example in humility to their flocks, so I as a mother am to be a humble example to our little flock. Now the passage takes on new meaning for me.
Now, brethren, in confession, may I assure you that a Christian mother cannot follow any other route to spiritual victory and daily blessing than that which is prescribed so plainly in the Word of God. It is one thing for a mother to choose a powerful text, and share it with her children - it is quite something else for that mother to honestly and genuinely live forth the meaning of the Word from day to day (before her children).
A mother is just a person - and often she has a proud little kingdom of her own, a kingdom of position and often of pride and sometimes with power. A mother must wrestle with the spiritual implications of the crucified life just like her children, and be a thoroughgoing woman of God and spiritual example to the flock of God, her children. She must die daily to the allurements of her own little kingdom of position and prestige.
It is easy to see that when our children were young, they saw us as the authority on all things in their world. And with good intentions, I used that authority to point them to the Scriptures and to fill their heads with knowledge about God and the Bible, thinking I was preparing them for life. But, in reality, it wasn’t until they witnessed the deposing of some of my own little kingdoms right before their eyes that they got to see and feel what a relationship with the Lord looked like. They needed to see the Kingdom of God rise out of the ashes of my old Kingdom of self and pride and power.
Those sins of pride, self and power were, by the way, many times disguised as spiritual self, spiritual pride, and spiritual power. I didn’t recognize them while I was functioning in them at full throttle. But, it is easy for people around us to recognize because those sins produce an air of spiritual arrogance or spiritual superiority and self-importance. The deposing of self is a most effective platform from which to reach people, and our children are no exception.
The direction the mature want to lead the immature is always toward less dependence on man and more dependence on God Himself. So the lesson for me in this devotional is that the I need to continue to depose my own kingdoms of pride, power and self, and keep letting the Great Shepherd of the sheep lead His own flock more and more.
Hmmm, I think that must be why I love, er, appreciate, Tozer so. He keeps pointing me, and ultimately our children through my changed heart, back to a living relationship with that Shepherd – as painful and humbling as that sometimes is.
Letting the Great Shepherd Himself reveal kingdoms of self and pride this morning along with you all….
Mardy
Saturday, January 5, 2008
God's Love Brings Change
Hello Everyone,
This newsletter’s topic is in reply to a note about how very hard it can be to submit to personal change. It’s especially hard when we don’t see anyone around us changing. My husband, Bill, who has watched me go through a great deal of change over the past 28 years, just gave this newsletter a big thumbs-up.
God bless! Mardy
Submitting to Change
It can be very hard to submit when we think the Lord is prompting us to obey Him on something. For me, it has felt like trying to swallow gravel, or like I’m hitting a stone wall of resistance inside that just won't budge. There are several things that have made it even more difficult for me to submit, and I share them with you in the hope they might help.
Unforgiveness
One problem I have had a lot of trouble with is unforgiveness. I would think, "How could they do that to me? How could people be so ungrateful after all the things I’ve done for them?"
One day when I was thinking about the Lord's Prayer that says we are to forgive everyone, I got a picture in my mind that really helped. I thought of myself standing inside a jail cell, trapped in expectations, disappointments and unforgiveness. Then I realized that the handle to my cell was on the inside. To get out of jail, all I had to do was turn the handle - release everyone of all their offenses against me - even though those hurts were real and deep. It’s scary to think about releasing everyone for every offense, especially in our own home, because it feels like we would be granting permission for them to keep offending over and over again.
I found that if I focused on the person or the hurt it seemed impossible to forgive. When I forced my focus back to the Lord, His word, His promises, His faithfulness, the freedom He gives - I gained the courage to take the risk and forgive.
Once I began getting out of the unforgiveness jail, I saw the same people totally differently, with strengths and weaknesses, just like me. Some of them were my brothers and sisters in Christ, but I had viewed them more as an enemy. I didn’t realize that the bars of my prison had blocked their good points from my view, so that all that I could focus on were their weaknesses and sins. Those weaknesses and sins were real – they had just been distorted because of my vantage point. Once I stepped out of jail, I began to see those people with a correct view – with both strengths and weaknesses, just like me. Several of my "jail-breaks" were instantaneous. For some, it took a little while for me to “rot in jail” before I wanted to get out bad enough. When I would finally get hungry enough for true manna and thirsty enough for living water again (closer fellowship with the Lord), I knew I’d do anything to get back to freedom. I had to want freedom more than I wanted my list of expectations and rights.
On a side note, if there is someone in the home or directly in our lives who is doing things that are illegal, immoral or dangerous to our children or us, we do have the duty to step in and protect. If that is your situation, your first step will still be to forgive. You’ll want to protect your children and yourself without the bondage and baggage of unforgiveness or bitterness.
Pride
That leads to the second problem I had, and still deal with sometimes - pride. For me, pride is that constricting feeling that rises up whenever I think about humbling myself before another person. It is especially noticeable if that person has hurt me or if I think they don’t like me or approve of me.
Something that helps me with pride is to look up verses on pride and see how detrimental it is, how much God hates it, and how grace (which brings power to obey the Lord) is not available unless I run from pride.
Once when I was sharing with one of our children about forgiveness, I painted a picture for him of being in the same jail cell that I had been in. But, instead of telling him about that handle on the inside, I told him that for him there was a little open door in the bottom of the cell. The problem was that he was standing on a huge stack of expectations. To get out of his cell he’d have to abandon his pride, climb down from those expectations (give them back to God), to get low enough (humble enough) to reach that little door.
Whenever I can feel pride starting to constrict or choke me again, it helps to remember how much freedom and joy there is waiting for me if only I will humble myself.
Fear
A third problem that kept me from changing was fear. I was afraid my children would make bad decisions as adults if I didn't get them straightened out beforehand, and that fear drove me to concentrate all my focus on them, rather than my own heart. The fruit of fear can be threats, lectures, scolding, heated discussions, bribes, tears, anger, criticism, cynicism, and many more things that hurt and divide people.
Fear itself can actually make the things we fear begin to happen. That’s because fear produces suspicion. When people are around fearful, suspicious people, it is very easy to tire of it and begin to think, “Well, if they think I’m going to make all those bad decisions (or make even more bad decisions), I might as well go ahead and make them. I’m getting accused of them anyway.”
I can always tell when I'm being driven by fear rather than being led by the Spirit. If I feel like I’m being driven, like I just "have to say it," it's usually fear. If I am able to wait on the Lord for the right timing to speak something, or wait on Him and not say anything at all but only pray, and I know I'll be okay in the Lord no matter the other person's response, then I know I’m being led by the Lord. He develops the fruit of patience and peace through trials of every sort.
If you are a Christian and have been led by His Spirit in the past and know what that peaceful direction is like, you can compare it to your reactions now. Romans 5-8 talks about what it looks like to be alive to God and dead to sin (being driven), and to be led by His Spirit. Here's a small section from Rom 8 that is always helpful to me:
Those who live according to the sinful nature have their minds set on what that nature desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. The mind of sinful man is death, but the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace; the sinful mind is hostile to God. It does not submit to God's law, nor can it do so. Those controlled by the sinful nature cannot please God.
You, however, are controlled not by the sinful nature but by the Spirit, if the Spirit of God lives in you. And if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he does not belong to Christ. But if Christ is in you, your body is dead because of sin, yet your spirit is alive because of righteousness. And if the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit, who lives in you.
Therefore, brothers, we have an obligation—but it is not to the sinful nature, to live according to it. For if you live according to the sinful nature, you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live, because those who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by Him we cry, "Abba, Father."
Isn’t it wonderful that we’re reminded to call God “Father” right next to the words about fear? God used so many wonderful names to describe Himself to the Israelites in the Old Testament, but it’s so comforting that the Name He used in this amazing covenant we are in today is “Father,” the very name Jesus called Him, and taught us to call Him as well. What an incredibly warm and loving term that reminds us each time we use it how very approachable and caring He is toward us! And that with God as our Father, we have nothing to fear!
Love
By contrast, do you know anyone who is very loving and trusting of you? Maybe even giving you more love and trust than you think you deserve? You are probably drawn toward them. Love draws, but unforgiveness, pride and fear repel.
I used to be afraid that if I gave love to a mischievous child that he would see it as approval of his behavior, a free ticket to disobey more. On the contrary, love was what he needed. I can never say that without adding that when I use the word “love” that I don’t mean abandoning consequences for sin or allowing a child to be disrespectful. I mean being approachable, soft, warm, respectable, caring, open and able to listen to him with real empathy, while remaining firm and following through on whatever consequences you and your husband have decided on. And remaining loving even if he doesn’t change. That’s how God loves us, and it’s how He wants to help us love others.
Love is a powerful thing. It makes forgiveness possible, melts pride and dispels fear. But, I first had to take my eyes off of my expectations to be able to forgive, off of myself to be delivered of pride, and off of other people to be set free from fear. I had to begin looking instead to Jesus, the beginner and completer of my faith (Heb 12:2), to begin receiving the kind of love that brings that kind of change. Receiving God’s love is the only thing that makes true change possible! We just have to really receive it, to be able to really share it. And the most effective times to receive it are when we see we are the most in need of it.
This newsletter’s topic is in reply to a note about how very hard it can be to submit to personal change. It’s especially hard when we don’t see anyone around us changing. My husband, Bill, who has watched me go through a great deal of change over the past 28 years, just gave this newsletter a big thumbs-up.
God bless! Mardy
Submitting to Change
It can be very hard to submit when we think the Lord is prompting us to obey Him on something. For me, it has felt like trying to swallow gravel, or like I’m hitting a stone wall of resistance inside that just won't budge. There are several things that have made it even more difficult for me to submit, and I share them with you in the hope they might help.
Unforgiveness
One problem I have had a lot of trouble with is unforgiveness. I would think, "How could they do that to me? How could people be so ungrateful after all the things I’ve done for them?"
One day when I was thinking about the Lord's Prayer that says we are to forgive everyone, I got a picture in my mind that really helped. I thought of myself standing inside a jail cell, trapped in expectations, disappointments and unforgiveness. Then I realized that the handle to my cell was on the inside. To get out of jail, all I had to do was turn the handle - release everyone of all their offenses against me - even though those hurts were real and deep. It’s scary to think about releasing everyone for every offense, especially in our own home, because it feels like we would be granting permission for them to keep offending over and over again.
I found that if I focused on the person or the hurt it seemed impossible to forgive. When I forced my focus back to the Lord, His word, His promises, His faithfulness, the freedom He gives - I gained the courage to take the risk and forgive.
Once I began getting out of the unforgiveness jail, I saw the same people totally differently, with strengths and weaknesses, just like me. Some of them were my brothers and sisters in Christ, but I had viewed them more as an enemy. I didn’t realize that the bars of my prison had blocked their good points from my view, so that all that I could focus on were their weaknesses and sins. Those weaknesses and sins were real – they had just been distorted because of my vantage point. Once I stepped out of jail, I began to see those people with a correct view – with both strengths and weaknesses, just like me. Several of my "jail-breaks" were instantaneous. For some, it took a little while for me to “rot in jail” before I wanted to get out bad enough. When I would finally get hungry enough for true manna and thirsty enough for living water again (closer fellowship with the Lord), I knew I’d do anything to get back to freedom. I had to want freedom more than I wanted my list of expectations and rights.
On a side note, if there is someone in the home or directly in our lives who is doing things that are illegal, immoral or dangerous to our children or us, we do have the duty to step in and protect. If that is your situation, your first step will still be to forgive. You’ll want to protect your children and yourself without the bondage and baggage of unforgiveness or bitterness.
Pride
That leads to the second problem I had, and still deal with sometimes - pride. For me, pride is that constricting feeling that rises up whenever I think about humbling myself before another person. It is especially noticeable if that person has hurt me or if I think they don’t like me or approve of me.
Something that helps me with pride is to look up verses on pride and see how detrimental it is, how much God hates it, and how grace (which brings power to obey the Lord) is not available unless I run from pride.
Once when I was sharing with one of our children about forgiveness, I painted a picture for him of being in the same jail cell that I had been in. But, instead of telling him about that handle on the inside, I told him that for him there was a little open door in the bottom of the cell. The problem was that he was standing on a huge stack of expectations. To get out of his cell he’d have to abandon his pride, climb down from those expectations (give them back to God), to get low enough (humble enough) to reach that little door.
Whenever I can feel pride starting to constrict or choke me again, it helps to remember how much freedom and joy there is waiting for me if only I will humble myself.
Fear
A third problem that kept me from changing was fear. I was afraid my children would make bad decisions as adults if I didn't get them straightened out beforehand, and that fear drove me to concentrate all my focus on them, rather than my own heart. The fruit of fear can be threats, lectures, scolding, heated discussions, bribes, tears, anger, criticism, cynicism, and many more things that hurt and divide people.
Fear itself can actually make the things we fear begin to happen. That’s because fear produces suspicion. When people are around fearful, suspicious people, it is very easy to tire of it and begin to think, “Well, if they think I’m going to make all those bad decisions (or make even more bad decisions), I might as well go ahead and make them. I’m getting accused of them anyway.”
I can always tell when I'm being driven by fear rather than being led by the Spirit. If I feel like I’m being driven, like I just "have to say it," it's usually fear. If I am able to wait on the Lord for the right timing to speak something, or wait on Him and not say anything at all but only pray, and I know I'll be okay in the Lord no matter the other person's response, then I know I’m being led by the Lord. He develops the fruit of patience and peace through trials of every sort.
If you are a Christian and have been led by His Spirit in the past and know what that peaceful direction is like, you can compare it to your reactions now. Romans 5-8 talks about what it looks like to be alive to God and dead to sin (being driven), and to be led by His Spirit. Here's a small section from Rom 8 that is always helpful to me:
Those who live according to the sinful nature have their minds set on what that nature desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. The mind of sinful man is death, but the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace; the sinful mind is hostile to God. It does not submit to God's law, nor can it do so. Those controlled by the sinful nature cannot please God.
You, however, are controlled not by the sinful nature but by the Spirit, if the Spirit of God lives in you. And if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he does not belong to Christ. But if Christ is in you, your body is dead because of sin, yet your spirit is alive because of righteousness. And if the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit, who lives in you.
Therefore, brothers, we have an obligation—but it is not to the sinful nature, to live according to it. For if you live according to the sinful nature, you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live, because those who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by Him we cry, "Abba, Father."
Isn’t it wonderful that we’re reminded to call God “Father” right next to the words about fear? God used so many wonderful names to describe Himself to the Israelites in the Old Testament, but it’s so comforting that the Name He used in this amazing covenant we are in today is “Father,” the very name Jesus called Him, and taught us to call Him as well. What an incredibly warm and loving term that reminds us each time we use it how very approachable and caring He is toward us! And that with God as our Father, we have nothing to fear!
Love
By contrast, do you know anyone who is very loving and trusting of you? Maybe even giving you more love and trust than you think you deserve? You are probably drawn toward them. Love draws, but unforgiveness, pride and fear repel.
I used to be afraid that if I gave love to a mischievous child that he would see it as approval of his behavior, a free ticket to disobey more. On the contrary, love was what he needed. I can never say that without adding that when I use the word “love” that I don’t mean abandoning consequences for sin or allowing a child to be disrespectful. I mean being approachable, soft, warm, respectable, caring, open and able to listen to him with real empathy, while remaining firm and following through on whatever consequences you and your husband have decided on. And remaining loving even if he doesn’t change. That’s how God loves us, and it’s how He wants to help us love others.
Love is a powerful thing. It makes forgiveness possible, melts pride and dispels fear. But, I first had to take my eyes off of my expectations to be able to forgive, off of myself to be delivered of pride, and off of other people to be set free from fear. I had to begin looking instead to Jesus, the beginner and completer of my faith (Heb 12:2), to begin receiving the kind of love that brings that kind of change. Receiving God’s love is the only thing that makes true change possible! We just have to really receive it, to be able to really share it. And the most effective times to receive it are when we see we are the most in need of it.
Friday, December 28, 2007
Christmas 2007
Merry Christmas 2007
Bill & Mardy, Jon & Sally, James, Kate,
Daniel, Stephen, Patrick & Joel
----------------------------------------
We have certainly felt the winds of a changing season this past year!
We have certainly felt the winds of a changing season this past year!
To read about our changes and see more pics, go to www.thefreemans.org/Christmas2007
Welcome to the "Mary" Heart Blog!
Hello Everyone!
Welcome to the new A "Mary" Heart Blog site.
After many tries at getting my "Mary" Heart emails to format correctly, and after listening to the good advice of several friends, I am officially starting a blog for A "Mary" Heart subscribers.
I looking forward to posting my newsletters and hearing from you!
Love in Jesus, Mardy
www.thefreemans.org
Welcome to the new A "Mary" Heart Blog site.
After many tries at getting my "Mary" Heart emails to format correctly, and after listening to the good advice of several friends, I am officially starting a blog for A "Mary" Heart subscribers.
I looking forward to posting my newsletters and hearing from you!
Love in Jesus, Mardy
www.thefreemans.org
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